Yesterday, in the midst of emptying my soul to the moon I found clarity. I found that it was time to let go. I cut the cords, i removed all our ties and finally said no more. Officially and without prejudice. Love is so strange. One moment you are wrapped in each other on cosmic levels and the next your eyes open and you realize the one you love, is not as invested as you thought. I had pulled back before and last night was on a different level. It hurt but it was necessary. So what came of that?
Guides and guardians who were wanting to talk to me, convince me that I was doing the wrong thing. No Artemis, he’s the right one. What are you thinking? What if you’re alienating yourself? What if this means you’re alone for life? What if this was the best thing for you and you’re throwing it away? What if this causes you to suffer? what if … what’s wrong with you? You’re going to hurt him! It was mayhem.
What does it mean to have a revolving door of people (and not people) come visit you? It’s … intense. Imagine waking up from heat induced nap only to find sad looking woman sitting on the end of your bed, watching you with troubled eyes. Sigh. Thank God this isn’t new to me and it doesn’t freak me out.. and I was far too groggy to be annoyed. so I sat up slightly, turned the fan to my face and listened. As she faded into nothingness, I closed my eyes and found the smell of jasmine on my nose. Ahh flowers. When I smell flowers when there is no reason to – it’s Archangel Muriel. She and I have talked over the twin flame debacle. She and her twin flame Archangel Michael, have been my inspiration for a long time. I couldn’t even talk to her. It was too much, I was already losing it after the sad lady and feeling Muriel there told me – Oh Artemis you fucked up big time. I just lost it and cried my eyes out like a baby. sigh- It didn’t end there. She left me alone, or rather my vibration fell so low, it seemed like she left. In came my twin’s people. The Guides, the guardians, the family on the other side. Everybody wanted me to reconsider, everybody wanted me to help him. Not easy, not fun, but I didn’t budge (massive pat on the back.) It’s never easy to hear that something that feels good in your soul is being frowned upon, but in my heart, it was the only choice.
Such a heavy evening. Love talking to spirits and learning, but the questioning from beings I actually like, well that’s hard. This morning I really felt a sense of relief in empowering myself. I felt like I had finally stood my ground and really did what was best for Artemis. I’m so exhausted though. Talk about a heavy experience.